Friday, November 2, 2018

FROM DEFLECTING TO REFLECTING: BEING RIGHT VS. BEING GREAT

The alarming spike in anti-Semitic acts (along with other hate crimes) in the past three years reached a crescendo with last week's brutal slaughter of Jews worshiping in synagogue on their Sabbath.

Antisemitism is hardly new. In the Book of Genesis we read of the handsome young slave Joseph, who rejected the advances of his Egyptian master's wife. To assuage her hurt feelings, the scorned woman turns to her other slaves to report that Joseph was the one who assaulted her, adding, "Look how this Hebrew was brought here (by my husband) to ridicule us."

As if she and her slaves had anything in common, she resorts to an "us vs. him" moment to gain their sympathy.

In the nearly 4,000 years since then, there have been many who sought to hold onto their power by seeking common cause with those they ruled through the convenient ploy of Antisemitism. Examples run from medieval blood libels to Eastern European pogroms, and from the Nazis' methodical disenfranchisement of the Jews leading to the Holocaust and the decimation of one-third of world Jewry.

Now we are witnessing the defamatory pronouncements against Holocaust survivor George Soros, who is vilified as a so-called "globalist," (code for "Jew"). Without a single shred of evidence, politicians claim that Soros is funding the trek toward our southern border of people who largely are seeking what most of our own ancestors sought in American - what President Andrew Jackson called "the asylum where the wretched and the oppressed find a refuge." 

Our president told reporters that such claims may be true; one individual was so moved to murder nine Jews and two police officers in a Pittsburgh synagogue, and another mailed pipe bombs to Soros and a list of others who have curried the anger of our president. Our president leads his followers to believe that members of the opposition party want no borders and to simply let everybody "invade us."

This, of course, is preposterous - not to mention dangerous and outrageous.  EVERY American wants to feel secure in our country.  Unfortunately, we are seeing fears being stoked until they turn extreme and then violent. "Us vs. them" has become the norm of the day as American society seems more divided than ever before.

As a sport psychologist I know that only when team members are able to replace fear with trust in one another can they achieve greatness.  Only when players are ready to honestly reflect on what keeps them divided, and resist the temptations to point fingers at one another, can they reach their best.

A college basketball coach asked me to work with his team because players' resentment about how much individual playing time they were getting was hurting team performance. We explored why players weren't feeling valued, why players were not ready to step up and take personal responsibility, and how to trust one another. Fears of being cheated out of playing time eventually gave way to greater cohesion and feelings of unity. The team went on to have a great season, winning their conference championship.

We Americans are a team, what President Jackson called "one great family." But like that college team, we are devoting most of our energies dividing each other into "us" and "them."
We act is if WE are always right and THEY are always wrong.

If we as a country are to be great, it will require a greater measure of trust and mutual respect than we have seen of late. We just have to decide if we want to be right (as factions) or great (as a team).

Thanks to Jon Meacham for the Andrew Jackson references from his excellent book, "The Soul of America: The Battle for Our Better Angels"



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